Cheers to being 30!
Happy Saturday!
This is one special day. On August 3, 1989 at 10:35 am I took my first breath in the small town of Carson City, NV.
It’s my BIRTHDAY!
And this birthday is not just any birthday, the big THREE-O! Now, I know you’re wondering why I’m all excited to become thirty and let me tell you, I wasn’t very stoked about it a few days ago. I kept having feelings of anxiety, worry and was feeling some fear, all leading to depression. I took some time to reflect as 30 loomed large on the calendar. While looking back at all of my hard work, I thought about what I’ve been putting in on a daily basis over the years and I realized that between dealing with depression, work, school, art, and relationships, I’ve often had feelings of failure.
I’ve felt like I haven’t accomplished anything, it has felt more like I have just been running around in circles. But, that is most assuredly not the case, even if that is not immediately apparent. As some of you may have felt the weight and struggle of depression, you know that it is REALLY hard to get out of your own head and move forward. That feeling of being an imposter is hard to shake.
As soon as I was able to step out of the dark hole, I came to a realization. Everything that I have gone through, the ups and the downs, has been the journey that has helped to build me into a stronger woman. Without all of the hurt, pain, and struggles, I wouldn’t have the drive I have today to push myself within my life and art journey. I have grown through the challenges, not only as a woman, but I have also grown significantly as an artist.
There were two memories that really stood out when I was looking back at my love of art from my younger days. First, I loved to draw, and I drew on absolutely everything. As soon as I could pick up a crayon I was hooked! Secondly, I smiled while I was remembering my grandmother teaching me how to hold a pencil properly, in order to better my skills. This is a moment I still cherish today, and it is hard not to smile while I hold a pencil when I think of her, especially since I still don’t hold it correctly! So, cheers those who have their own way of doing things and stuck with it even though others said it was wrong!
I prefer to frame my life in the perspective of – Everything happens for a reason. To be able to learn and use those lessons to better yourself and possibly help others is a magnificent thing. Turning thirty is just another milestone on my journey. I am embracing it, using it as a point to reflect on life, learn from the past, and use the tools gained to make life spectacular! Who else is looking at life this way? When I sat down today I was going to write about different stages and obstacles in my life, but I now realize this is not why I am writing to you. The journey through my teens and twenties was a real mess, and I know I’m not the only one who thinks this about their life. All I can say is there is still hope! Just stay strong and take one day at a time. Live in the moment of every day, and your life will become more meaningful, mine definitely has. Now I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, I still struggle everyday with starting my day on a good mark with motivation and positivity. Learning to recognize your triggers and knowing what to tell that little voice in your head is a huge key.
I sit here contemplating how amazing my thirties are going to be. A new chapter for me to focus on myself, my relationships, and my art more intensely, and become a happier, healthier self!
I urge you to reflect on the good and the bad events in your past and focus on the lesson learned, how you can use those experiences to enhance living in the present moment and how you can make a better future for yourself.
I would love for you to write in the comments about any of the lessons you’ve learned and how they helped you grow. Everyone needs to hear inspiring stories to keep them on track.
Thank you lovely humans!
Here’s to being thirty! CHEERS!
I hope you have a wonderful day,
Kortney Beth