Find Your Strengths
While on my ongoing journey of self-discovery, I have been faced with ups and downs. Some days there are feelings of excitement and motivation, while other days feel powerless, like all of the energy has been stripped from my body. I have been asking the universe to help guide me and help me focus on becoming more self-aware.
Relearning how to listen to my intuition has become a priority. I previously have not realized how listening and actually hearing my intuition made me who I am. Somewhere along the way, I stopped listening to my inner light, darkness began manifesting and this power was lost. When I lost the ability to hear myself, I lost my way. In recent weeks, I’ve recognized that the reason I have been feeling weak is from the darkness blocking my vision.
During my self-guided search to find my way again, I’ve really started to notice the signs the universe has been tossing my way. A big one that has landed in my path is a local retreat for makers (a community of crafters, builders, and artists). I’ve always wanted to immerse myself in a retreat with other creators, and all of a sudden, here was my opportunity. At first, I was extremely excited that there was finally a retreat close to home that was semi-affordable and specifically for makers. I instantly wanted to sign up, but then, the darkness was creeping into my psyche. My mind began to spiral into chaos, and all of these unproductive thoughts began overwhelming me.
I don’t have money to splurge on something like this.
I’m not successful enough to join these amazing humans (there is a term for this – imposter syndrome).
I will feel out of place.
What will my boyfriend do with the whole weekend free of me?
It’s winter, the weather is unpredictable and I won’t be able to make it if it snows.
If it snows, then not only will I not go to the retreat, but I will be out of pocket the cost, money I could’ve saved.
So I went from being thrilled about the retreat to self-sabotaging, thinking only about how this is was a bad idea and I didn’t deserve this. I stayed on this train of thought for a good week before I finally told myself “I am enough!” That change in attitude was accompanied by another sign. Without me asking for help, a friend covered the cost of the retreat for me, and at that moment, I felt like the universe was telling me I had to go. I couldn’t just ignore what was happening; when the universe gives you an opportunity, you should take it, so I did. There are a lot of humans that self-sabotage and end up getting stuck in the same place, lamenting their space, but not making the effort to change. We all have thoughts like these at one time or another, but we need to stop listening to the darkness and push through to strive for a better life.
Within the first couple of days of registering, they sent a link to complete an assessment before the retreat in December. The assessment was an additional cost above my registration fee. I was wary about spending $19.99 more on an online assessment to tell me what my strengths were, but something in my heart was telling me to go for it. This was my intuition coming back to me. The Clifton Strengths assessment is a web-based assessment of normal personality from the perspective of positive psychology.
The results weren’t that surprising to me. It told me that my five top strengths were Adaptability, Connectedness, Learner, Intellection, and Achiever. I instantly thought to myself “Did I just waste twenty bucks for an assessment to tell me what I already knew about myself? Did my intuition guide me, or was it the darkness that was still taking control?”
I decided to focus on the positives, to focus on what the assessment was telling me that I might not have thought about at first glance. It took a few moments to dig deeper into each strength to realize, yes, I do have all of these (and was pretty aware of them already), but I can improve. The more I read about my strengths, the more I felt gratitude for the universe as my guide. It was as if the universe had just handed me a checklist of things I need to focus on in order to grow and continue to outwardly become the person I really am inside.
There is always room for improvement, we just need to focus and have the want to improve ourselves.
I thought to myself, if this is a list of my strengths, then I want to cultivate and master them. I will be diving deep into each strength to improve and master the strengths inside me. This will take time, I will need to internalize a new way of thinking and adapt the way I live day to day, but that is one of my strengths, adaptability. I am excited to see what happens next. This journey of self-discovery has been such an enjoyable ride, and it’s only going to get better!
I will be going deeper into each of my identified strengths, as the weeks go on, and pull out all of the information I need to create and adapt to a new way of being. Having lost a part of me, I feel as though this an ideal moment to push myself forward to live my best life and to thrive.
I am urging you to dig deep inside yourself and look for your own strengths. If you are having trouble with this, or it is hard for you to see your own strengths, I recommend taking the Clifton Strengths assessment. It gave me a new perspective and guidance on what I needed to focus on.
Here is a link to take the assessment if you are interested in learning more about yourself. Clifton Strengths Assessment
Have a wonderful day and start creating!
Kortney Beth
Life is Art, Start Creating!